08:24 pm
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I Tyalie: The Game
Many of my readers should be familiar with The Gap Game or The WalMart Game or some variant thereof. The object of these games is to enter the named establishment, proceed to the farthest back wall, touch the wall, and then exit, all without being accosted by a store representative. If played in a group, the game's object is to complete these tasks the most quickly. I have played The Gap Game several times, and it is both more challenging and more fun than one might at first suspect.
Still, a nerd must have her own particular brand of game. And as nerd-attracting establishments aren't as big on blonde-ponytailed salesgirls smiling inanely and pretending to like the customers, to play a game similar to The Gap Game at a nerd hangout would lack the necessary challenge. I have, therefore, come up with my own game to play at my favorite brand of establishment, the bookstore. (It should more precisely be called "The Bookstore Game," but I, in my megalomania, refer to it simply as "The Game." Besides, I'm usually inside a bookstore when I suggest it, and I would wish not to be redundant.)
The Game is simple. Its object -- to find the best romance-novel title. It is especially fun to play this game in a large group, with everyone invading the romance section at once. It may be difficult for females to convince males to play, but once the guys start playing, they quickly lose their inhibitions and begin calling out "Naughty Girls Go for Rogues" and embarrassing the females in the group. It's all part of the fun.
I first thought of The Game when I was a bookseller at Waldenbooks for a summer during my college years. We were a small store, and I was doing inventory section by section. When I got to the romance section, I was surprised by just how many subgenres there are in romance. There is not simply one "historical" subgenre; there are Victorian, Regency, Colonial, Medieval, even more specialized subgenres like Viking romances and medieval Scottish romances. My favorite subgenre, however, is paranormal romance. That's right; I mean vampires and aliens. After all, nothing says sexy like a blood-sucking cat-man-thing, right?
And then there were the titles. I expected titles like "The Hellion Bride" and "Wicked Embrace," but I about fell down laughing in the middle of the store when I picked up The Very Virile Viking. Even after years of playing The Game, I have never found a title to beat that one. I'm ready to declare it the all-time best.
Of course, each Game is its own entity, and no formerly-found titles are allowed in play. I'll admit that there is some subjectivity to the judgment of what constitutes the best title, but tasteful and honest players should have no real difficulty agreeing on a winner. In my experience, it's usually quite clear. Titles can win for shock value, as did "Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down," one of the first winning titles found by a male. Often they win for wordplay and bad puns; examples include "What an Earl Wants," "You've Got Male," and, one of my favorites, "One Knight Stands." I played once with ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) faerymere and was convinced that I had won from the moment I found Enslave Me Sweetly, yet she beat me at the last minute with Sex and the Single Vampire. I know when to admit defeat.
So what are you waiting for? Head out to your favorite bookstore and start playing today! And make sure to drop me a line if you find a really excellent title.
Current Location: home
Current Mood:  mischievous
Current Music: Big Bad Voodoo Daddy
Tags: romance novels, the game
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